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if suicide isn’t the issue, they’ll still appreciate
your care and consideration in talking to them.”
From this point, the conversation can go in
one of three directions. The first possibility is
that they say no, but thank you for checking in.
The second is that they say no but do disclose
some of the stresses in their life. Sometimes the
indicators of increased stress can be the same as
those for suicide, which is why it’s so important
to ask.
“Don’t be surprised if someone says they’re
not suicidal but does want to talk about what’s
stressing them out,” said Thompson. This is also
important because supporting them and alleviating
stress can help prevent suicide thoughts
before they start.
The third possibility is that they say “yes,”
they are thinking about suicide.
“If they do say yes, it’s important to take them
seriously,” said Thompson. “Don’t assume that
they’ll get better or work through it alone. At
that point, it’s up to you to help them.”
The good news is you’ve already been brave
enough to start this conversation and come this
far, so you can get through the rest as well.
“Emphasize that you care about them and
you want them to stay safe and alive,” said
Thompson. “Tell them that you want to connect
them to a resource for more help, and that you
can do that together.”
Examples of resources can include your HR
department, Employee Assistance Program
(EAP), a crisis line, a mental health clinic, a hospital
or a faith leader. LivingWorks ASIST is a
program designed to provide someone with
these skills. Remember that not all resources are
available in all places, and not all of them will
work well for all people.
“Knowing your local resources is half the battle,”
said Thompson. “That’s some homework
you can do beforehand, and it will help you
greatly in that moment. For example, if you have
high confidence in your HR department’s ability
to help, and you’ve talked to them, you can
not only use them in that moment, you can also
recommend that as an avenue for other employees
to use.”
Once you’ve identified a resource, do everything
you can to see the connection through.
“If possible, wait with them while you dial
the number, or walk or drive with them to help,”
said Thompson. “You don’t want to intrude on
their privacy, but you also want to make sure
that they get connected to that help.”
Thompson also has some guidance on what
not to do.
“Avoid phrases like ‘It’ll get better’ or
‘Everyone goes through tough times’ – when
someone is thinking about suicide, those statements
feel empty,” he said. “Similarly, don’t try
to solve their problems or carry out a full-scale
intervention yourself. There are training programs
out there that can help you do that even if
you’re not a mental health professional, but unless
you’ve gone through that training, you’re
better off connecting them to trained help.”
Ultimately, Thompson says, it’s up to each
of us to watch out for one another, just like you
would for a co-worker at a worksite filled with
hazards such as slips, trips and falls.
“As someone’s co-worker or supervisor, we
spend a lot of time with them – maybe even
more than their family. That means we’re one
of their best defences if they’re struggling. We
have a relationship with them, and we can use
that connection to engage them and help them
stay safe. There’s real power in that.”
LivingWorks offers a range of easy and effective
online and face-to-face trainings to help with these
conversations. Learn more at www.livingworks.net.
thinkbigmagazine.ca | Quarter 2 2020 | Think BIG 31
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